Interview with a Mistress part 1

Posted: May 23, 2011 in Uncategorized
How did you get started and where does your name come from?
I have always been sexually kinky and after venturing into the BDSM scene in a personal capacity on the masochism side in 2007, I ended up topping a fella in a club one evening and my partner pointed out not only had I thoroughly enjoyed it, but in his opinion ( having been on the scene for 15 years) said he thought I was pretty good at what he’d just witnessed. So why not give it a go professionally, he suggested.
But its a huge step from one play session to pro, but after several months of personal practice play on willing male subs, finding a venue and kit and building my website,( plus I have a self employed business background)I got started in December 2007. My best female online friend who I do my web design etc with, used to use Mephisto as her online name, but had changed it that year, so I asked if I could use it and she agreed and thought it highly amusing for me to do so!
So you played a bit then thought you’d make some money?
Umm…no. A lot more complicated that that. Yes, being my own boss appeals to me, and I already am in one profession, but I have always enjoyed being the boss in relationships and in fact ones where I have not been in hindsight have not succeded. I enjoy control, organising, technical ideas in BDSM and most of all teasing the hell out of a sexually frustrated man. In fact once I have got started professionally I soon wondered why I hadn’t done it before, it seemed such an obvious profession for me.
So do you do ‘everything’ or have certain specialities?
I don’t do any role play, adult/baby, serious medical (ie anything beyond a few needles), smoking or scat. They don’t interest me enough to want to become good at them. I suppose my speciality is sexual sadism with bondage. So having the body tied or restrained in such a way that it’s impossible for the sub to enjoy himself or gain any pleasure until I decide he can have it. Usually through torturing the cock and balls while erect, sensory deprivation, arousing the skin sensually with anything from a feather through to a pair of nail studded gloves or a riding crop. I also enjoy electrical play (although not violet wands), outdoors play and humiliation.
Will you do other activities in the future?
I already do an awful lot, but I love to learn and enhance what I know, particularly rope work and using home made toys or gadgets brought by my subs. I’m all for imagination and trying new things. I hate too much repetition and repeated activities in sessions.
Where do you work from, your own place?
Sadly not at the moment. A really good BDSM venue/dungeon/studio costs a lot to set up and when I get around to doing it, I want my palce to be special, so right now I use a really good commercial venue in Reading, Berkshire. But I have used others around the country. Before I start a session I make sure everything I want to use is clean, insertables are used with condoms and I check that any bondage equipment is fully functioning before embarking on any play. I won’t compromise safety or cleanliness.
Will you hold a session with just anyone who can pay?
NO. I have a good ‘spidey sense’ and if it tingles when I’m talking or in mail contact with a person then I won’t take a booking. Not necessarily because I think they are dangerous but that they may not be compatible with my own types of play, or be after something to prescribed or simply because I can! I make my own rules. It’s my neck on the line if something goes wrong and I have learned in 20 years in business, to go with my instincts. I should also hasten to add I will not engage in a session with anyone if they turn up drunk, under the influence of drugs or are dirty/have poor hygiene. If you smell, you’re out.
Do you really like the people you session with?
Yes, is the easy answer, but there are degrees as with any human interaction.
Some subs walk in and you immmediately hit it off and have the most mind blowing session ever. Others are there to merely have an itch scratched and are fearful of putting anything of themselves into the exchange of power. So if they hold back, I can’t get under their skin – I can’t work miracles.
I love noisy subs and silence is sometimes problematic to read a person with. If you can’t let yourself go in a purpose built dungeon with a Mistress smacking your arse when can you???? But some people are restrained characters.
The more a sub puts into a session the more I will respond and the better the time had by all. But isn’t that the same rule of thumb for most relationships?
Are you a sex worker, prostitute, whore?
Yes, no, and only in private.
Sticks and stones etc etc…terminology is irrelevent. I know what I am and if you visit me, then you will know too.
How do you actually manage to beat someone hard enough to make then bleed?
I do it with a sadistic streak a mile wide and because I know they really enjoy putting their bodies through that much torment. Some people only achieve calm through extreme pain and exertion, I am familiar with that myself, so therefore delivering that level of pain is extremely important for some people.But delivering it in a controlled, calm and sensual way is what I enjoy.
I see no difference in someone who enjoys being caned till they bleed and someone who enjoys bungy jumping or skydiving or extreme scuba diving. Some people, especially men, enjoy pushing themselves to the limit physically.
What can you not ‘Domme’ without?
My teeth.
Seriously, I can dominate dressed, naked, in leather, in PVC, in a suit. Clothes are just window dressing, all I really need are my hands and my brain.
If I so choose I could dominate a submissive naked apart from my high heels and with a 3ft piece of string.
Do you prefer long term subs or new ones?
Long term obviously, because they are my bread and butter. Also because I prefer sessions with depth and that’s hard to create with someone you have just met. You may get moments when you click and you can give a sub a sensational time, but layers and depth are only really achievable when the sub see’s you regularly and you can let the relationship evolve.
Do you have personal subs? Can I be one?
Yes, I have several personal playmates and subs who are also friends/fuck buddys/part of my bdsm family. I live in a polyamourous relationship with one prime partner and several other part time/flexible partners. Like all good relationships they have come about because they and I have ‘clicked’ personally. I do not generally expect friendships to develop outside of sessions with my professional submissive’s. But all relationships are different and I don’t analyse or make judgements, I just enjoy whatever happens.
What do you do to relax?
I love spending time with my family, and also gardening – mostly veggies, walking- Lake District, Scotland and Yorkshire Dales, music- heavy rock such as Rammstein, SOAD, Tanzwut, KMFDM, etc. Reading – trashy novels and autobiographies. I’m a big DIYer and very practical. I also attend bdsm clubs and parties, but often in a private capacity. I love to play with newbies and you may have played with me and not even know.
If you had a million pounds….??
Big house by a river, narrowboat, villa in Greece, holiday home in Ambleside, Cumbria, racehorse or two, Aston Martin Lagonda, Tickets to Goodwood racing festivals and British GP every year…oh, is that my million gone? It would have to be two million then…:-P

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